Communication is Key

**Allow me to preface this post with the statement that these are my communication techniques and while I may think they are super, they may not work for everyone because not everyone is me, and well, that's probably a good thing. Nevertheless, the blog must go on:

Communication is one of the most important aspects of leadership and of life. Though people often think of verbal communication as the most important type, communication comes in many forms and it is often the non-verbal communication that is more powerful than the spoken or written word. Communicating with an individual can be very different from communicating with a group. It is more intimate and what is said and acted out has more meaning because it is all directed at one person. When trying to communicate with an individual, one should:

1. Have positive body language

They way you position yourself when talking to another person says a lot more than what you verbally communicate to them. It is important to be aware of your body language. Unless it is freezing outside or you would like to convey that you have no interest in talking to a person, do not cross your arms.

2. Listen

Communication is a two-way street. You have to listen to the other person to appropriately address the issue at hand. If you want others to listen to you, you need to listen to them as well.

3. Be Direct

It is important to be honest and clear with what you are telling someone. Whether you are directing them in a leadership position or having a casual conversation, saying what you mean (in a polite way) is just the easiest way to get things done. Yay for efficient speaking.

4. Gesture! *waves arms*

Okay so this is more of a personal mode of communication, but I find that when I'm saying something I'm either a) very passionate about, b) not quite sure how to put into words, or c) don't even really understand myself, I use my hands to accompany my voice. Obviously it is not good to be obnoxious and fail your arms every two seconds, but, I mean, if you REALLY need to get a point across then gesturing wildly will surely get someone's attention.

5. Use Your Words

People do not automatically know what you are thinking. It's a common misconception that many people have. Luckily, the fix is simple: tell people. Let people know how you feel or what you want to get done. This kind of goes along with being direct and against gesturing, but just imagine if someone stood facing you, listening to what you had to say, responding in a direct, clear, eloquent way while casually motioning their hand to enforce what they had to say. I say that's brilliant! (as I face you and clasp my hands in victory)

When communicating with a group, I use different communication skills because it is a different environment. Honestly, dealing with a large group of people can be difficult because in group settings, many people do not refer to my guide #2 above. I'm not a misanthrope, I'm just saying people tend to do what they want instead of listening to authority sometimes. So when address a group of people (especially in a leadership position) one must react accordingly. When trying to communicate with a group, one should:

1. Be loud, but not obnoxious

Being a rather quiet person, I realize that being loud is a gift that should be cherished, but also a curse when trying to tell secrets (but secrets don't make friends right?). It is important that people hear you when you are giving instructions so finding someway to make yourself loud enough to be heard is important. On that same note, yelling and/or screeching at people is both obnoxious and annoying and may lead to mutiny. If you are a pirate.

2. Make yourself be seen

Obviously when communicating with a group, it is important that they see you in order to listen to you. If you are fun size rather than like 10'8 maybe get a box to stand on... or a stage... or have the group make a circle and stand in the middle so they have no choice but to look at you. Really though, when you can see the person who is talking to you, you tend to pay more attention.

3. Be Direct

Woohoo! A repeat. Refer to #3 above.

4. Allow people to ask questions

Your directions to a group may be painstakingly clear. You may have been standing on a stage, speaking into a microphone, saying specifically and detailed-ly what you want to be done. Despite your best efforts, there are people who will have spaced out and have no idea what you just said. Therefore it is a good idea to ask the group to raise their hands if they have any questions or need any clarifications. Sometimes people just like the chance to hear themselves talk too. It's okay, we all want to be heard.

5. Be Friendly

This may be the introvert in me but working with big groups can be tiring and wear your spirit so it is important to remember to be friendly! People respond much better to a smiling face than a sullen eye roll. It's also a good idea to be friendly in general because when you are nice to others you often feel better about yourself.

Another type of communication that I feel is effective, but maybe not as socially acceptable or comfortable is if I want people to do something, I just do it first. Kind of like leading by example, except less noble. Say people are standing awkwardly in a circle at a gathering when there are couches right there and nobody wants to make the first move. I would simply slowly migrate (or just walk straight over) and sit down. Being the awkward first person to do something is sometimes intimidating, but it is oh so effective and ultimately shows that you are a team player. 

Again I would like to say that these tips do not apply to everyone. Some people are naturally good at working with groups and some are uncannily remarkable at holding one-on-one conversations. These are just some ideas, springboards if you will for better communication. Because after all, communication is key.

Note:

I definitely did no research on proper communication for this blog, this is all from personal experience.

I would also like to apologize for my horrendous misuse of "one" and "you," one should simply not switch between the third and second person... That means you!

And forget first person...